After I graduated from Basic Obedience my human pack leaders (HPLs) began taking me to two local bark parks. (Ed. Note: Officially known as dog parks.) Many bark parks have play sets. (Ed. Note: Officially known as dog agility equipment.) Many HPLs try to get their dogs to use these contraptions, usually to no avail. Us dogs never use on these objects on our own. We are there for more serious socialization, greeting and sniffing each other and/or sniffing the prior comings and goings of other dogs.

We think it is hilarious for our HPLs to try and catch us when they want to leave the bark park. If only they knew how we help each other avoid capture by running interference and communicating the whereabouts of those trying to sneak up on us. (Ed. Note: Not funny.)

One final observation about bark parks, especially concerning us smaller dogs. We don’t really care to have the little people (Ed. Note: He means small children.) running around or running directly at us. We have nothing against little people, as we a little ourselves. Unfortunately, their erratic movements scare us. And that makes us bark to warn them away.

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

January 3rd, 2009 | Canine Culture
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About a week after I graduated from puppy kindergarten my human pack leaders (HPLs) enrolled me into Basic Obedience. (Ed. Note: Harvard told us this was also a prerequisite.) My HPLs and I went to the local National Guard Armory for these classes. We would arrive early so I could greet the my other classmates. Before the training started I would go around to each of my classmates and see how things had been in the week since the last class. It only took a few minutes since us canines, by using our scents, communicate more information much faster than humans. I guess this is how I came to be known as “Mac the Diplomac.”

Basic Obedience was my last formal training. My picture shows how blue I felt when I graduated and would never again see my classmates. (Ed. Note: We decided Harvard was too liberal for Mac, and instead are concentrating on Hillsdale College in Michigan.)

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

December 27th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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When I was about 11 weeks old, my human pack leaders (HPLs) decided I was in need of a top-notch education. So off we went to puppy kindergarten. (Ed. Note: Harvard told us this was a prerequisite.) My HPLs also had to attend the six weeks of classes. We learned to sit, stay, and come. I also got to socialize with the other puppies in the class. Some of these puppies were a lot bigger than I was. It helped me gain confidence. (Ed. Note: At first he would try to hide behind us, but that was not allowed.) Soon I could play with any dog of any size or age. Sometimes I would go up to an older dog and get in their muzzle. I learned quickly not to do this without an invitation. They did not teach that in puppy kindergarten.

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

December 24th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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When my human pack leaders (HPLs) forked over the $1000 to my breeder Lois, they drove me to my new territory. We stopped for my first dining out meal at a Wendy’s. The HPLs were trying their best to make me feel welcomed and safe. To be honest, I was scared, being only eight weeks old and never apart from my mother and brother and birth house. Overall, it was rather traumatic.

At this point in my life I did not associate car rides with fun, obviously. (Ed. Note: For the first few days Mac would get nervous when we put him into the 4Runner. But knowing many dogs love car rides, we thought it best to develop a plan to help him get over his fear of cars.) With tremendous fortitude and my sense of adventure I quickly mastered car riding! (Ed. Note: We first put down the tailgate of the 4Runner and got in the back with him, without starting the vehicle. After he got comfortable with phase one, it was onto phase two; starting the 4Runner and sitting in the back with him. Phase three was slowly driving a short distance. Phase four was driving him wherever he wanted to go.)

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

December 13th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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When I am out and about many dogs are amazed with the life I have lived so far. So it got me to thinking, why not blog about my exciting past a little bit.

Today I will start at the beginning. (Ed. Note: He did not remember any of this, so I filled him in on his earliest days.) I have posted the first picture taken of me by my breeder, Lois. She sent this to the people who became my human pack leaders. When the female human pack leader showed the picture to the male human pack leader he exclaimed “You want to pay $1000 for that slug!?”

Well, they did; and I’m worth it!

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

December 5th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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Unfortunately, once again I am unable to feed you my weekly dog words of wisdom. My pack leader was willing to take a few minutes to translate this. He is busy finishing some computerware (Ed. Note: He means working all kinds of hours to help a new client.) One thing I have picked up during this last week, Vista is not nice. (Ed. Note: He means Vista works poorly as a simple file server.)

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

November 29th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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I am unable to feed you my weekly dog words of wisdom.  My pack leader was willing to take a few minutes to translate this.  He is very busy putting in computerware (Ed. Note: He means implementing software for a new client.)  Hopefully he will be done next week and we can get back to more important stuff!

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

November 22nd, 2008 | Canine Culture
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As posted a few weeks ago, for the most part dogs are not political animals. (Ed. Note: He still intends the pun.) Nonetheless, dogdom is sadden American voters did not find it in themselves to replace Barney and Miss Beazley as first dog (or first and second dogs) with Sam the English springer spaniel and Coco the All-American (Ed. Note: Still a mutt.).

The bottom line is, don’t blame me, I didn’t vote for the dogless one.

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

November 8th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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I want to thank Wally for filling in for me last week. He did a commendable job. It is nice to know I have a backup blogger.

The presidential election is the big news these days, especially among humans. You may not know but dogs vote, too. Our votes may not be counted, but we express our feelings. Wally and I went with our pack leaders to the polls to vote early last week. If you do not know, dogs do what we call “reverse voting.” We vote against a candidate. This is how I marked my ballot.

(Ed. Note: He is not making this up. He dropped his ballot at the base of the sign. And there were only a few Obama signs in the area. Mac had to work to find one.)

Thanks for your time, but now I have to catch some rays.

November 1st, 2008 | Canine Culture
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Hi. I’m Wally. My big brother Mac has asked me to fill in for him this week. He’s taking a short vacation to celebrate his birthday on Monday. He will be eight dog years old. But don’t let his age fool ya. He is one energetic dog. I am so proud to be able to call him by brother. (Ed. Note: Mac and Wally are not blood relations. They are step brothers, but don’t tell Wally that.) A week ago we went to the bark park and Mac runs as fast as I run. Even though people say we are “so darn cute,” our brand (Ed. Note: He means breed, which is Papillon.) is known for agility and speed and other cools things we can do if appropriately rewarded.

Thanks for your time. This has been fun. I hope I get to do it again.

October 25th, 2008 | Canine Culture
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